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Let’s Resurrect Chivalry
Chivalry. Who uses the word these days?
Chivalry. An honorable and polite way of behaving, especially toward women.
Chivalry. Is it something women want from any man, their man, or no man?
Chivalry. Is it dead? Should it be? Who gets to determine its fate?
What’s wrong with treating women like they’re special? Would it embarrass your wife or girl friend if they were treated as though they were the most delicate and precious person on earth?
I remember reading stories about the brave knights of old. Even while dressed in armor and chain-mail, they treated each lady with dignity and respect. They fought to defend a woman’s honor. They would dismount from their steed just to assist a lady who had dropped her kerchief.
What do “big men” do these days? How “manly” are the young and powerful studs of the twenty first century?
Just how much of a man does it take to coax a young woman into having sex with him? How strong is the man who feels he needs to show his strength by slapping around a woman half his size?
What’s the definition of “man” these days?
Young lady, how could you ever think of yourself as some punk’s property? To be treated as some stud’s conquest. God made you to be more than some perverted soul’s plaything. You were created to be a prince’s lady. A prince; someone who knows the meaning of chivalry.
You are not someone’s inflatable doll to be used up and then thrown back into the closet.
And young man, God designed you to protect your lady! Her reputation, her emotions, and her body.
Chivalry. I wonder if MTV, Hollywood, or The Young and The Restless ever heard of it?
Chivalry. Would it redefine the modern woman?
Chivalry. Could magazines such as Cosmopolitan and Playboy still survive?
Chivalry. Is anyone interested in it anymore?
I remember hearing stories of men removing their coats and jackets, and laying them on the ground, on top of a mud puddle just to keep a lady from getting her shoes dirty. Now, it seems as though society tries to find ways to throw women into the mud and dirt.
Is it beyond the imagination to dream of a day, of a society, where men act like real men; men who treat women like real ladies? Is it too much to ask?
Well, I can’t control what others think or do, but I can do my part.
Chivalry. It’s one way to show my love and devotion to my lady.
My wife.
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The Man Who Would Be King
Once upon a time in a world much like our own, lived a man who had only one ambition.
He wanted to be king.
It didn’t matter to him which nation he ruled; he just wanted to be king. As far back as he could remember, he wanted to be king.
Each night before he went to bed he’d brush his teeth, floss, and stare in the mirror for five minutes repeating his narcissistic mantra.
“I will be king, for I was created to be king. I will rule over others for that’s why I was born. It is my destiny, it is my rightful place in this world. King Mamba Carob. Yes, I was made to be king.”
Mamba was an only child; the son of a man with an explosive temper, and a woman who lived to please her man; whichever one she had at the time. Yes, he was merely a child when the idea of becoming a king began to consume him. And watching his mother interact with her “men” helped shape Mamba’s worldview; become king, gain servants, keep people under your thumb and never have to answer to a soul.
His mother wasn’t exactly what you would call beautiful. Poor thing. She was however quite intelligent, except where it came to men.
As for the men in her life, if you’d line up ten of them, with all but one having great jobs, wonderful people skills, plenty of savings in the bank, and faith in God, and tell her to pick one of the men to date; she’d pick the one loser in the bunch. That’s just how she was.
As Mamba’s mother bounced from man to man, from one abusive relationship to another, Mamba saw his mother sign up for one government program after another. She called it surviving; he saw it as his due. She was thankful for the help. He believed he deserved more.
After all, why should so many have so much when he had so little.
Oh, but that would change. Yes, indeed.
All through the years of his youth, and on into his young adult days, Mamba kept his dream, his destiny, alive and thriving. Nothing and no one mattered as much as his kingdom. His very own kingdom.
It didn’t matter what he had to do, who he must walk on, or whether he needed to fabricate a lie just to get past a particular line of questioning; he was ready for the task. Conscience? A luxury he couldn’t afford to have if he was to be king.
And he WAS going to be king!
“A king can’t afford to be close to anyone”, was one of his favorite phrases.
Nothing meant more to him than the kingdom; Mamba’s kingdom. And he had learned “kingdom philosophy” from some of the best teachers in the land. His parents.
The dads lived for their own pleasure. His mom behaved like a groveling sycophant who was afraid of her own shadow. Be the king of your own life, your own little domain. Control how others think and behave. Don’t be answerable to anyone but yourself.
And he came so close. So, so close.
But he never made it. You see, there can be only one king. Only one. And no matter how much you want it, or how many people you trample into the ground while attempting to secure your own kingdom, it simply won’t work.
Oh, sure, you can rule your little world and force everyone around you to bow before you three times a day. You can succeed in fooling everyone into believing you are something wonderful and grand. But there’s someone who knows who you really are; your fears, your flaws, and your foolish beliefs about your self importance.
No matter how big you are, there’s someone bigger.
Regardless of your intelligence, there’s always a person who is smarter.
And you may be the richest, best dressed, most powerful person in your world; most generally, that’s how we all like to see ourselves.
You may have had a better childhood than Mamba, or you may have had to fight and scratch, beg borrow and steal for every little worldly treasure. Some may believe you have the bull by the horns and are sitting in the catbird seat.
But there’ll always be someone you must answer to.
Always.
So why not start now?
Yield to the only one who has the right to be king. King Jesus.
“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
“Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” (Philippians 2:5-11 ESV)
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My Thoughts About Gay Pride
I believe this nation has had all it can stand where political correctness is concerned.
Correctness? Who came up with that one anyway?
Do you want to know what it was that got me started on this tirade? Tonight, in my hometown, there’s a Capital Pride Parade. Why should that bother me?
Does it not bother you?
Apparently June is Gay Pride Month. Nice. It’s a month to recognize “gays” for their achievements and contributions.
Which is a nice thing to do. It’s nice to recognize people for the great things they do. It’s important for our society to honor people who make a difference in the lives of others.
But what in the name of Heaven does their sexual orientation have to do with it?
Do they do their honorable deeds because they are gay? Does their “gayness” represent something they’ve had to overcome, making their contributions much more valuable? You know, like Helen Keller? She was the first deaf blind person to earn a Bachelor of Arts degree.
Years ago, while watching an old Muppets movie, “Muppets Take Manhattan”, I learned something from the character named Pete. He had a line in which he said to Kermit, “I tell you what is, froggy; peoples is peoples.” Isn’t that a great line?
Why doesn’t our nation get it? Why don’t we let people just be people?
Gay Pride. Really? Pride?
Look, I’m not against anyone or any particular group; I want everyone to be happy. And I want everyone to know the love of God as revealed through his son, Jesus Christ. But pride thumbs its nose at everyone else, including God. Pride tells all who will listen, “I have a better way. I know more than you. I am better than you.”
That may work with our society. But it doesn’t impress God.
And in spite of the opinion of a few, it doesn’t add anything to someone’s story.
Let’s drop all of the labels and tags. If someone does a great thing, recognize him or her with a plaque, award and a cake. Interview them and let them tell their story. But for Pete’s sake, don’t ask them which gender they prefer to make love to! Too much information. And it’s nothing to brag about.
Pride. That in itself should be a clue something’s wrong.
Oh, by the way… About 3800 years ago there was another city having a Gay Pride parade.
But that one was rained out.
Sorry, no picture with this post. Nothing seemed appropriate.
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An Allergic Reaction? A New Allergy?
Is it just my imagination, or are there a lot more allergies and medical conditions affecting people these days? Is it a sign of the times?
I just learned of a new allergy condition today. The FDA has just recently approved a new medicine to help control the symptoms. The medicine is completely organic, and has only one minor side effect.
The AMA* has issued this announcement to inform the public of these rather odd reactions.
1. Itching and fidgeting start after sitting in room more than fifteen minutes (unless watching any type of sports program)
2. Music causes ears to automatically plug completely (does not happen when listening to 70’s rock album)
3. Legs become weak and wobbly when asked to stand (symptom doesn’t occur if outdoors, in own home, or at work)
4. Temporary paralysis in hand and arm when attempting to remove wallet from purse or pants pocket (very localized symptoms and times of occurrences)
5. Suggestion of possible exposure can create insomnia 12 hours prior to exposure, and severe drowsiness during episode (temporary symptoms, quick recovery)
6. Severe rash covering all uncovered skin when confronted with outstretched hand (does not seem to happen inside shopping mall)
7. Stammering lips when asked to give opinion (symptoms never noticed inside neighborhood diner, but tests are still being conducted)
8. An uncontrollable urge to check watch every three minutes (again, very localized symptoms and times of occurrences)
9. Eyes flutter nervously every five minutes with frequent glances to ceiling (symptoms seem to endure for not less than 45 minutes, with 120 minutes being the maximum time)
10. The uncanny ability, though only temporary, to read people’s minds and know their motives with only a single glance (coincides with number 9, fluttering eyes)The symptoms described here are associated with Ekklesiatis; a condition more commonly known as “being allergic to church”.
There is one known cure, but be forewarned, the medicine must be taken regularly, AND for the duration of one’s life. Everyone who has taken the medicine for an extended period of time has developed peculiar traits. For more information, please call your pastor, or read your bible.
“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25 ESV)
*American Ministers Association
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Do The Opposite
Even though I may act as though I’m a well of information, I must say this: that absolutely and positively, beyond the shadow of a doubt…
I don’t know everything.
Just in case you were wondering.
But I have learned one or two things along the way. But any 60 year old is bound to have learned a few things just by simply walking the road of life. At least they should.
I want to share with you one thing. Just one thing. One thing I’ve learned from experience and from God’s word. One thing that, if you’ll learn, can put the devil beneath your feet and joyful praise in your heart.
One thing.
Here it is: when you are tempted in any way, shape or form, and you recognize the desire to do thus and so…
Do the opposite.
That’s right. Do the opposite.
Tempted to eat too much? Do the opposite.
Tempted to talk too loud? Do the opposite.
Evil people cursing you, threatening you? Do the opposite.
Tempted to gossip and speak ill of someone? Do the opposite.
Be not overcome with evil, but overcome evil with good. (Romans 12)
Do the opposite.
Tempted to ignore the poor, the widow, and the fatherless? Do the opposite.
Sexual desire, uncontrolled thoughts raging through your mind, pictures of pornographic images hinting and hollering at you to merely relax, yield, and fulfill the passion that is growing within…
Do the opposite. Pray for your spouse, your mom, your sister; unhitch yourself from the train of wanton desires by hitching up to the opposite.
Do good. Think good. Live good. Be good.
Anyone can give in to pressure. It’s not hard to do. But those who do end up feeling like some kind of five day old road kill. And all they have to show for their life is a flattened tail that twitches now and then.
The voice of everyone in the nation may be screaming at your face, trying to weaken your resolve to talk right, live right, be right. Just remember, the word “No” carries with it a limitless supply of authority and power; it can stand up to one or one million.
If you’ll do the opposite.
When pressure comes knocking at your door, all dressed to kill, do the opposite. Think the opposite. Speak the opposite. Believe the opposite.
Repent before you need to.
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Let’s help our pastors
I’ve mentioned a lot about helping our pastors, taking care of them, and trying to get God’s best to flow through them. That’s the purpose of this book. Hope you check it out! Thanks
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Joel Doesn’t Always Smile
People who see me out and about, wearing my ministry face, shouting hallelujahs, may not believe there’s another side of me.
I’m not always full of pep. I don’t always have my pastor cloak draped over my shoulders. Actually, there are times I simply want to be left alone so I can brood my life away.
Sometimes I have a hard time with my circumstances. They seem to run me over when I least expect it.
And yes, there are times when I beat myself up with self-condemnation. It’s like I take the sword of the Lord, God’s word, and stab myself over and over until I run out of energy.
It’s not something I’d ever advise someone doing, yet I find myself doing it. Every so often.
Too often.
Like today, for example. My stomach started bothering me yesterday, cramping and acting all goofy. The same thing it’s done for a number of years. No doctor has really been able to help me, so I quit going. I just ride them out when they happen. Until today. The pain and duration was more than I could handle, so my wife drove me to the emergency room.
Four and a half hours later…medicine to help with the symptoms. And a bill due for several hundred dollars.
Why am I telling you all this? Because you need to understand that pastors, people in ministry, DO NOT live a perfect life! They can be attacked spiritually, physically, emotionally, financially, and socially…just out of the blue.
I’m sure you’ll never hear any of the big name televangelists tell of their woes on national television. However, you will receive mail asking for donations to help them pay for this or that ministry or problem.
Joel Osteen doesn’t flash that million dollar smile 24/7. TD Jakes will have days, or moments anyway, when he simply doesn’t know what to do. Kenneth Copeland can’t always be above only, and not beneath.
I’ll just bet they don’t always preach a perfect sermon. And if they don’t, they trash it. It won’t be put on the air.
No, I’m not blasting them. Great men of God, I’m sure. But they’re only men.
The men of God who’ve recently committed suicide were people well respected and admired in their cities and churches. Probably seen by all, wearing their church smiles, and ministry hallelujahs. But somewhere along the line the enemy got in and took control.
It’s not necessarily just one thing that shoves them over the edge. Many times it is a combination of events, and one proverbial last straw.
I cannot over stress the need for people like you and I to look after our pastor. We need to cover them, support them, and release them to do God’s bidding. It’s not only for their benefit but for ours as well.
Please check this book out for more ideas about how to help your pastor. “How To Get The Most Out Of Your Pastor.” Available @ amazon. Also, if you’ll notice the page on this blog titled “Kindle eBooks by J.Grace”, click on the page and it will open up with links to amazon.com.
Don’t let a flashy smile or an expensive suit fool you. Pastors need our help.
Now more than ever.
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Superman Is Not A Pastor
Superman isn’t real.
Neither is Batman, Robin, the Hulk, Aquaman, Spiderman, or any other “Super-Hero”. There IS such a person as Bat Boy, but no one’s ever called him a hero.
Fantasy! Pure, unadulterated fantasy.
I’m not condemning such activity as falderal. I’m only using America’s obsession with superheroes to make a point or two.
Point #1. People who spend most of their time living in a make believe world do not function well in the real world.
A hard worker has plenty of food, but a person who chases fantasies ends up in poverty. (Proverbs 28:19 NLT)
Fantasyland is a great place in which to escape, once in a while. Entertainment can be a great way to relax and recharge one’s batteries. Temporarily. Not permanently.
Point #2. It seems to me, maybe you haven’t recognized it, the superhero phenomenon has found its way into the church.
Pastors, evangelists, and teachers are looked upon by many as supermen and women, able to tackle any and every problem that comes their way.
Oh, and let’s not forget the worship leaders. Many have been elevated to the superstar status (even though they have not sought such a position or status). Whenever Lex Luthor or the Riddler begin causing havoc in the church, all our superhero needs to do is don their cape and the enemy flees.
Of course people need to esteem their spiritual leaders highly, for their work’s sake. But leaders aren’t heroes. God never intended for them to fight our battles FOR us, but WITH us. Leaders lead as people walk and work with them.
When is the last time you ever saw Superman ask someone for help? “Relax, Lois, I can handle this.” “Jimmy, put the phone down. I don’t need the national guard.”
I’m concerned for our spiritual leaders. Especially our pastors. With a nation obsessed with fantasy movies, fantasy games, fantasy football, fantasy, fantasy, fantasy; is there any wonder people expect their pastors to be perfect? And that only adds pressure to the lives of those who don’t, and can’t, measure up.
I don’t believe I have ever read a DC comic book that has a pastor as the super dude.
I’ve lost track of how many pastors have committed suicide within the last year, but there have been many. “Successful” pastors with large ministries have finished their lives before their course was completed. I am NOT speaking of them in a disparaging manner at all. I AM trying to speak of the pressure and deep spiritual warfare they have to endure.
And treating them like a superhero doesn’t help.
Superheroes have to live in fantasyland. They could not survive in this real, nasty, ugly world. Yes, they knock the snot out the villains in Metropolis and Gotham City. But bring them into the world you and I live in and they fall apart.
Fantasies limit what can be accomplished in the real world. “They who chase fantasies end up flat busted and broke.”
It’s time to help our pastors.
I have written a book called “How to get the most out of your pastor”. It’s available @ amazon.com, as a Kindle eBook. One of the main reasons I wrote the book is this: if we will support our pastor as the scriptures instruct us to, God can minister to and through the leader as he said he would.
As I said, it’s time to help our pastors.
Help them to understand we don’t expect them to be our hero. We don’t look to them as our deliverer. We already have one. His Name is Jesus!
When we want a hero, we’ll go check out a movie or read the comics.
Otherwise, we’ll live in the same world as our pastor, upholding them in prayer and supporting them in every way possible.
Like allowing them to burn their Superman suit, and be real.
Unlike Superman.
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The Same Care
What if I cared for you the way you care for me? But then, maybe you’re caring for me the way I’m caring for you.
How’s it really working?
When you’re going through hell, am I drenched in sweat? Do I smell like sulphur?
When I receive the greatest news I’ve heard in twenty years, are you as excited as I am?
The same care.
If you are down and out, how can I offer a tired, worn out cliche? Is that the kind of care I’d want? If your heart is breaking, would you prefer I pull up a chair and listen? Or, should I dig out my book of pat answers?
I don’t always want someone around me when times are tough. So maybe we’d better not guess at what the “same care” means. Maybe it would be best to articulate to each other what we mean when we say to each other, “Will you care for me like I care for you?”
Having the same care for one another isn’t as simple as an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth. It isn’t necessarily equal exchange. You know, I gave you $20 when you needed money, so when I need money you give me $20. That’s not what I’m talking about; and I don’t believe it’s what Paul was referring to either.
Different parts of the body have different needs, but they each require the same care.
Think of it like this. If I’m to care for my body each part has to be energized, motivated, to get involved. My hands are involved in helping care for my teeth, my feet, and my hair. My teeth, feet and hair each receive the same care only it looks different. Sure, I brush my hair AND my teeth, but in a different manner. I wash my feet and my hair differently. But each receive the same care.
Some people (parts of the body of Christ) need more care than others. But it’s still the same care. I wash my hands several times a day, but I don’t trim my finger nails but maybe once a week.
But they each receive the same care.
So, five things to ponder…five things to ask ourselves.
Do I care for others in the way they need cared for?
Am I caring because I’m obligated; because they helped me before?
Have people cared for me as though they really knew what I needed?
How do I care for others?
Have I ever used a toothbrush to brush someone’s head?
Have you?
“…God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.”
(1 Corinthians 12:24-26 ESV)The same care.
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The Backslider’s DIY Checklist
“The Backslider’s Do-It-Yourself Checklist” – A Public Service Announcement
In today’s religious world, the word “backslide” seems a bit archaic. I am not being critical; I’m only stating what I’ve observed. I can’t recall the last time I’ve heard the word used in a conversation. Even while talking with other pastors and ministers; the word seems to be gone for good.
Well, maybe not for good.
Tell me, what word would you use to describe a person who seems to have lost their passion for God, for his Word, for his people and church, and for sharing the Good News with others? What word would you substitute for the word “backslider”?
Maybe words like “contemporary”, “progressive”, “relative”, “understanding”, or “liberated” should be used.
When Jesus mentioned the Ephesian church in Revelation chapter two, he reminded them they had left their first love. Sure, he didn’t use the word “backslide”, but was he commending them for pressing into his kingdom or was he rebuking them for their lack of passion? “Left” wasn’t used in the sense of someone leaving one place for someplace better. Just the opposite.
Maybe the reason the word has gone by the wayside is that everyone is passionately seeking God, earnestly desiring to know and do his will. Maybe that’s the case. After all, “this is the Age of Enlightenment! People don’t sin like they used to! People aren’t as uptight about what’s right and wrong; the dogmas and doctrines of the hypocritical church are finding themselves replaced by a much more palatable line of thinking. God is love, man. Jesus came to teach us all how to get along together. He came to show us all how to BE God; and how to release the gift of God within us.”
I’m not going to accuse anyone of anything. I have my own heart to consider. I have my Lord Jesus to answer to. Just like everyone else.
So without pointing any fingers, and to keep from making anyone feel like they’re on trial, I decided to write this post as a public service.
It’s called “The Backslider’s Do-It-Yourself Checklist.”
It’s not a test. It will not be graded. There are no right or wrong answers. It’s simply a checklist to read (and consider).
If you don’t like the title, feel free to change it. Use one of my alternate words like “the liberated DIY checklist.” Call it what you like. But please, for everyone’s sake, use the checklist.
“The _____________________ Do-It-Yourself Checklist”
“The backslider in heart will be filled with the fruit of his ways, and a good man will be filled with the fruit of his ways. The simple believes everything, but the prudent gives thought to his steps. One who is wise is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is reckless and careless. A man of quick temper acts foolishly, and a man of evil devices is hated. The simple inherit folly, but the prudent are crowned with knowledge.” (Proverbs 14:14-18 ESV)
Backslider – to flinch, i.e. to go back, literally (to retreat) or figuratively (to apostatize)
The Backslider: (again, use a substitution if the “B” word bothers you)
–Is filled with the fruit of their own ways. No one is going to tell them what to do, or how to be. After all, they love God just as much as the next person.
–Believes it’s permissible to do anything they want to do.
–Is reckless and careless, and very quick tempered. Touchy, thin skinned, and ultra defensive in regards to their spiritual condition.
–Has a rebellious attitude toward God’s testimonies, and turn away from God by turning to idols. “Yet they tested and rebelled against the Most High God and did not keep his testimonies, but turned away…” (Psalm 78:56-58 ESV)
–Believe their own lies. “Then why do these people stay on their self-destructive path? Why do the people of Jerusalem refuse to turn back? They cling tightly to their lies and will not turn around” (Jeremiah 8:5 NLT)
–Is self-deceived; they know what to do but won’t do it. “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.” (James 1:22 ESV)
–Devotes themselves to deceitful (lying) spirits, and teachings (instructions) of demons. The lie or teaching will probably be something really simple, like – “no one cares for you, everyone is judging you, God won’t forgive you this time, and on and on.” “Now the Spirit expressly says that in later times some will depart from the faith by devoting themselves to deceitful spirits and teachings of demons, through the insincerity of liars whose consciences are seared.” (1 Timothy 4:1-2 ESV)
–Neglects regular fellowship and church attendance. “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25 ESV)
–Hears the word, but doesn’t keep the word during periods of spiritual attacks. Tribulation and persecutions come to steal the word. The cares of the world, the deceitfulness of riches, and the desires for other things ENTER IN and choke the word. “And they have no root in themselves, but endure for a while; then, when tribulation or persecution arises on account of the word, immediately they fall away. And others are the ones sown among thorns. They are those who hear the word, but the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches and the desires for other things enter in and choke the word, and it proves unfruitful.” (Mark 4:17-19 ESV)
“Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers.” (Psalm 1:1-3 ESV)
Keep this list handy. Not for use on others, but for yourself.
By the way, in case the checklist helps you uncover a problem, keep this phone number handy.
JER-3303
“Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.” (Jeremiah 33:3 ESV)
And for the guarantee fine print see the Savior’s advertisement in Hosea 14:4, “I will heal their backsliding, I will love them freely…“
Jan Grace
adding God's Word into my world…
